Category Archives: EDUCATION & SEX

Unsafe Sex Worries? Try Kink, Safest of All!

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Kink is finally being included in safe sex education, safe sex practices, and safe sex tips

Startling revelations are often made in movies or on T.V. that an antagonist practices “kinky sex”. God save him or her who does! The origin of this societal taboo is unknown. In his 1905 published works, the famous psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud essentially labels kinky sex as psychopathology. But, were his ideas based on scientific fact, or are they simply just another form of irrational sexual prejudice? Very little is really known with confidence regarding regular sex practices (“kink” or otherwise) of adults, despite an abundance of attempts at studying them using so-called modern scientific methodology. One example that comes to mind is the “Kinsey Report”, published in two parts in 1948 and in 1953. The main problem with this and similar studies is that their “findings” are based on observation of self-selected subjects; i.e., subjects  who decide for themselves whether or not they wish to participate in the study.  Dubious survey results that are subject to respondent bias are also made use of.  More simply put, subjects who volunteer for a sex study  or who respond to a sex survey, are seldom representative of the population-at-large.  For similar examples of this, see “Male with Low T? Try Nude Sunbathing” (Spanking FIT , Dec. 2014). Let’s begin by examining so-called “normal” sex which, for the purpose of discussion, we define as heterosexual vaginal sex.

Unwanted consequences of “normal” sex- (1) S.T.D.s or (2) pregnancy

Religious scholars throughout the ages have condemned out-of-wedlock sex, as well as other forms of sexual abundance, and labelled it as “promiscuity”. These early thinkers were probably empiricists of sort who observed a correlation between frequent sexual partnering, possibly practiced by their contemporary sex workers, and an elevated incidence of venereal disease. Often sickness is considered synonymous with sin. Jesus, according to New Testament, is said to have referred to those who were ill as being possessed of an evil spirit. Despite understandable misconceptions, early philosophers may have served a valuable function in passing these warnings down to humanity through the ages. They were the early advocates for safe sex practices, and the conveyors of safe sex tips for their day.

(1) S.T.D.s as an unwanted consequence of “normal sex”

First and foremost among the venereal diseases or S.T.D.’s is A.I.D.S., a modern plague of Biblical proportions. Most medical professionals recommend that a high quality condom be used each and every time “normal” sex is performed, unless we are absolutely certain of the monogamy of our partner or his or her H.I.V. status. There is little doubt that condom use during intercourse is advisable because it limits semen and vaginal fluid exposure. However, condom use provides far from perfect protection against A.I.D.S. and other viral infections. Truthfully speaking, despite an abundance of research on the subject, the effectiveness of condoms in protecting against viral infections such as A.I.D.S. is quantitatively still unknown. In “Scientific Evidence on Condom Effectiveness for Sexually Transmitted Disease (S.T.D.) Prevention” by N.I.A.I.D., National Institutes of Health;7-2001, scientific reviewers claim that no well-designed study exists addressing this issue. It states, “the ideal design, a prospective randomized controlled clinical trial has not been used evaluating condom effectiveness because of ethical concerns associated with non-use of condoms in high-risk populations”. Published results are observational only, comparing the incidence of infection in those reporting “using” versus “not using” condoms during sexual intercourse. The bottom line is that the effectiveness  of condoms in preventing us from contracting S.T.D.’s, including A.I.D.S., is not known.
On the other hand, using dildos or vibrators or practicing cunilingus or anilingus with a high quality dental dam is a far safer option. That’s right- it is advisable to use protection even during oral sex. While it is unknown whether or not H.I.V. may be transmitted via oral sex, it is well-known that other S.T.D.s like “shingles” are.  Shingles is caused by the Herpes Simplex virus, and is definitely no joking matter.

(2) Pregnancy as an unwanted consequence of “normal sex”

Unless a couple desires having children, some form of birth control needs to be used to prevent pregnancy while maintaining sexual relations.  Some religions still maintain moral objections to all “unnatural” forms of birth control. For those who adhere to this view, the previously mentioned alternatives to “normal” vaginal intercourse may be used along with the kink practices to be explained below.   The fact of the matter is that very few of the religions involved currently spell out prohibitions against these specifically, although that was not always true. (Historical records dating back to medieval times show that priests and Church officials often went to great lengths to catalog and comment on kinky sex practices).  For the majority not opposed to birth control, there are a number of options available to reduce the probability of pregnancy. Among the options are (a) condoms or intrauterine devices (I.U.D.s), and (b) oral contraceptives, including “the pill”.

(a) Condoms and intrauterine devices (I.U.V.s)

Just as it is unknown what the true reliability of a condom is in preventing S.T.D.s, strictly speaking  it is not known precisely how reliable a condom is either in preventing pregnancy. According to the Center for Disease Control website (cdc.gov/reproductive health/ unintendedpregnancy/contraception.htm) typical condom use carries an 18% failure rate. That means, according to them, that 18% of women experience unintended pregnancy within a year of “typical” use. Intrauterine devices (I.U.D.s) are believed to be more reliable, but carry risks due to the metals and hormonal substances that they use.

(b) Oral contraceptives and “the pill”

Oral contraceptives, including the so-called “pill”, contain hormones estrogen and/or progestin. According  to National Institutes of Health website information (nih.gov/medlineplus/druginfo/meds/) there may be serious side effects to using these products including loss of vision, fatigue, bleeding, and an increased risk of cancer, heart attack, and stroke. I personally discourage the use of products with potentially serious side effects unless they are intended to cure life-threatening ailments and as a last resort only.  Although these products  are F.D.A. approved, keep in mind that they are not F.D.A. tested, and that the F.D.A. issues testing guidelines only to the manufacturers,  as a general rule.

On the subject of abortion

When protective measures fail and pregnancy is undesired, some women may feel a need to resort to abortion. The subject of abortion is a focal point of much heated societal debate, as you all know. In my opinion, the question of when life begins cannot be resolved scientifically and questions regarding this delicate subject need to be resolved by the individual based on their own personal moral beliefs, standards, and circumstances.

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Now for Kink

Certain forms of kinky sex including gentle flogging, bondage, and S & M role playing minimize the type of genital contact that leads to venereal disease development and the moral dilemmas surrounding unwanted pregnancies. Kinky sex may be combined with other activities for added pleasure such as hot oil massage, masturbation, and the varieties of oral enjoyment that were previously referred to (i.e., cunilingus/ anilingus with protection) Couples who engage in role play should alternate between the so-called S or M role to balance out potential psychological impacts.  For gay couples in particular, kinky sex can offer a far safer alternative to standard gay sex activities which carry an even greater risk of A.I.D.S. than their straight counterparts.
Exercise moderation when using toys such as whips, paddles, or handcuffs. They can and do occasionally cause serious injury. Nevertheless, the risk of an occasional bruise or scratch resulting from kink sex is far less serious than the long lasting harm that “normal” sex can cause including disease and unwanted human life. Think about it and please let me have your opinion.                                            Dr. Garrett

Photo credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/poolski/770587310/in/photolist

Creative commons license: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/

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